Maybe an alternative option for the awkward Valentines Day scenario.
I have a new sexual fantasy. The old one was all about doing it in a kiddie pool filled with baby oil. The other old one was doing it anywhere with Mark Wahlberg. But this new one involves doing it with… you’re not gonna believe it, but… a male escort.
It’s not because I can’t get laid. I mean, Jesus Christ, I’m a WOMAN. I could very easily step outside at any time of day and find someone to poke me within five minutes. Or I could go online and find someone within five seconds.
But in this fantasy, I don’t want some random schmuck — I want a pro. Someone model-hot, who knows what the FUCK he’s doing, to come over and do exactly what I want, for as long as I want — and I don’t have to do a goddamned thing.
Don’t get me wrong, under normal…
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